MY VBAC BIRTH STORY

This is my vbac birth story on bringing my daughter Earth-side. Enjoy.

On July 30, 2023 I got to experience natural childbirth for the first time as a mother of two. You see, my son was born via cesarean because doctors said he was fat and could get stuck so I did what I thought was best. Countless women expressed how much they loved their c-sections so I was optimistic that my experience would be just as good. Turns out, I hated it and vowed that the next time I got pregnant, I would only do a natural birth.

November 30, 2022 I found out I was 3 weeks pregnant and my doctor confirmed it. It was then at the office that I told him I’m going for a vbac. At 14 weeks I discovered I was going to have my daughter. That night, God revealed my delivery in my dreams. He showed the doctor placing her on my chest and me crying into Victor's arms saying “I did it.”

Fast forward to July 28th at 11am in Newburgh getting my mommy mani. A series of grooming prep for my girl that I was trying to take care of, you know, hair, nails, lashes, and a wax. She was due August 10th and figured I had tons of time to get myself ready. I started early labor, light contractions, nothing daunting but I felt these weren’t the Braxton Hicks I had my entire pregnancy, so I knew she was coming soonish - I just didn’t realize how soon. Contractions eased the rest of the afternoon until about 5pm during dinner. They were getting worse but bearable so I began timing them and kept my night going, did my son’s night routine and put him to bed at 8:30, per usual.

But contractions were getting more painful and I began to freak out because we had a U Haul booked for 7am to move into our temporary apartment because our house was being sold…and yes, also my daughter was coming. At midnight I couldn’t bear the pain. I told Victor that we have to wake our son and go to the hospital, so we left. I got admitted at 2:20 am on July 29. I was 2cm dilated - shocked. I was in so much pain I thought “I have to be at LEAST 4!" No, just 2 so I walked and bounced until I was 3cm to stay in the hospital or I would’ve had to have labored at home which was a BIG no. 3 hours later, 3cm dilated and we got an epidural cause the pain was NOT IT.

Next doctor to come on the scene was my favorite one, the man who delivered Victor, my HUSBAND 31 years ago. Needless to say I was very confident and comfy. My water hadn’t broken yet and in the span of 6 hours, I was only 4cm, but no pain which was nice. At this point it was past 7am and Victor left the hospital to move us into our apartment. My mom came at 3am that morning so I wasn’t alone, thank God because while he was gone, I went through a lot!

This is where my timestamps get foggy because girl, we went through it. I had my doctor break my water and humped on a peanut to get even more dilated because I was 4cm for what felt like forever. He didn’t want to put me on pitocin due to a uterine rupture (where your uterus tears or breaks open, rare but is a risk for C-section mommas) and wanted me to progress naturally. I was getting the shakes and my nurse thought things were moving along nicely. She felt my belly and says “uh oh, she’s sideways”

Now I’m freaking out cause transverse means surgery. She takes that time to tell me what to do to get her flipped back head first, in addition to telling me that now my water is broken pain will come as she lowers resulting in the worst pressure I could ever feel, as well as saying if I feel any pain in my scar that’s automatically sending me to the OR for surgery. Then she just left. BUT there were other mommas there who were having the worst day of their life and they came first, which I understood. My mom helped me flip and turn and hump the peanut until we confirmed my daughter was back head first. Hurdle 1 down.

Next was the slight pain I felt in my scar…which I lied and said I felt nothing. Truthfully it was tricky because I felt awful pain in my lower belly and upper pelvis. Where’s my scar? Right in between those spots! For the next 2 hours as each contraction came I felt my scar to gauge where my pain was and even though I felt discomfort, that didn’t warrant surgery to me, so I said nothing. As she lowered, the pain was only in my pelvis and I was in the clear. Hurdle 2 down.

I’m sure you’re wondering why I felt anything at all being that I got an epidural. So here’s the tea. The epidural helps a lot before your water breaks, once it does, baby is lowering into your pelvis then vagina. The epidural takes away pain, not pressure, which hurts like hell. Oh and I can’t forget that beautiful moment my epidural stopped working on my right side for a couple hours. My doctor’s shift was coming to an end, my mom left to grab my son, and my husband was back with me. My doctor did his last cervical check of his shift revealed that I was only 5.5cm. You can imagine the sobbing that took place when after 12 hours I was only one and a half more cm dilated, but what I didn’t know was the next 6 hours would be the hardest 6 hours of my life, and that’s when I really sobbed.

My final doctor, Dr. Curro, came in. I had never met her and she also was pregnant. She checked me and said we need to go on pitocin. I asked if she was concerned about a uterine rupture and she confidently said not at all, I was only 5.5cm at that point and we needed to get my contractions steady and in rhythm for baby to keep coming down. I followed her lead. She did what no doctor wanted to do which was give me medication. We began with small doses of pitocin to see how my daughter reacted to them. Unfortunately we couldn’t get a good read so they recommended inserting a tube that rests on the side of her head and that should give them what they need to track my progress and keep the pitocin doses increasing. If not, they would insert the screw in her head. Big no. I told them, if we can’t get a read, cut me. Thankfully it worked, however the pain soon became intolerable. My back felt as though it was getting ripped from the inside while burning. I wanted to give up.

Those hours of pain lasted through 3 additional doses of medication from the anesthesiologist, the Crawford v Spence fight, a hysterical FaceTime with my mom, and 6 hours of nonstop excruciating pain in conjunction with body breaking pressure of my contractions. I was shaking, praying, crying, and delirious at that point. Turns out my spine was being pushed on from both sides, my daughter and my epidural. I begged my nurse to get the doctor and cut me. I was breaking. I thought there’s no way I can keep going. My nurse looked at me and said "You're already 7cm, only 3 more to go and she'll be here." 2 hours pass and she brought in my doctor for another cervical check. Victor was rubbing my head and telling me the affirmations I had given him months prior. I was trembling in uncontrollable pain when she finally said the three words that rose me from the dead. “Time to push.”

I looked like Frankenstein rising up on the table when he came alive after she told me it's time to push. My eyes widened, my spirit sprightly, and I was in disbelief that it was finally time. My adrenaline drowned the pain and I nearly ripped my gown off trying to prop my dead weighted legs into the hands of my nurse and husband. I spread myself so damn wide and tight, my nails were digging into my inner thighs, I wanted babygirl to have a WIDE OPEN doorway.

First push and I failed. They say to push like you poop. WRONGish. It’s hard to “poop” laying down so the technique isn’t the same. Which is why the first 20 mins of pushing did very little for me. *Push from the belly down, like you’re pulling a rope in tug of war and release from the butt, that’s how you push. And when done correctly, you might poop, which yes I did, twice.

They don’t tell you how dehydrating it is either, I felt like a boxer in the 12th round and my husband was giving me water and wiping off the sweat coming into my eyes. Then fear set in. It brought me back to the concerns of my son, getting stuck. I thought “What if she get’s stuck and they have to intervene? This fight would’ve been for nothing.” Although I didn’t think it, I said it. My nurse stopped me and said don’t speak like that, you can do this, you were made to do this. And thats all I kept saying, “I can do this, I was made to do this.”

The ring of fire is exactly how it sounds, fire right on your vagina, but it meant one thing, my daughter was about to be here. We were 39 minutes into pushing and my doctor asked me if I had one more push in me before the contraction was over. Silent, sweaty, exhausted, focused, and ready, I nodded yes. I thought of my mom in that moment. She had told me of her labor experiences, unmedicated and under 5 hrs for both my brother and I. She told me I would get scared but then something happens where all fear evaporates and it's just you and your baby. You are the only one who can push them out. No matter how tired you are, you find that last ounce of energy and you give it everything you have. So I did.

I pushed as hard as I could, broke every blood vessel in my face, and screamed an animalistic, fierce woman warrior scream that flooded the room. And right at that moment, I heard her cry. My girl was placed on my chest at 2:52 in the morning and I cried into Victors arms saying "WE did it". My girl and I went through one of the most traumatic and beautiful experiences together. We did it. After doctors told me we could lose our life attempting a VBAC, we did it. The pain vanished as though the last 36 hours didn’t happen. I held her and thanked God, my doctor, and my incredible nurse, Gianna. An actual gift from God.

God showed me we would do it, he didn’t show me the fight it would take to get there for good reason. I had to fight for what I wanted and I got it. He gave me the birthing support team any woman could dream of having. To be honest, my birth only happened because of my nurse, Gianna. She stayed up with me, held me as I wept in pain, brushed my hair out of my eyes, supported my husband supporting me, she cheered me on as I pushed and celebrated with me as I held my daughter.

No form of birth is easy. There is no easy way out in bringing life into this world. I am proud to be a c-section mom. I am proud to be a vaginal birth mom. My babies are healthy and I am healthy. I spoke my labor and delivery into existence every single day and prayed when I had my doubts. To all my mommas reading this, I see you. To my mommas wanting a vbac, you can do this. Keep an open mind to all possibilities and stay safe.

Thank you for reading,

XO, Kiah